How do you fart when you are at a chess tournament?

Do you fart at a table? Do you lie down and let one out?

How do you peacefully pass gas at a chess tournament?

youtu.be/ytYaPaV7Q6o

You must ask permission from your opponent & arbiter. If they give you permission, then you can fart. But if you fart without permission, prepare to meet the consequences:

lichess.org/forum/general-chess-discussion/what-if-someone-is-farting-during-serious-chess-match?page=1

Benjamin Franklin wrote a book on that subject titled
'Fart Proudly'

Chess and farting is always a great combination. Botez sisters know also a lot about farting.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=rBdeFbTRLKQ

Without any sounds but I didn't have any courage... afraid they told the arbiters then kicked me

I love to fart on crowded buses/trams/trolleybuses. Usually I try to spoil the air with a whisperer, but even if it turns out loud, I don’t get upset, anyway, in the crush and with the noise of the engine, it’s impossible to establish who farted. I like to watch the reaction of passengers: at first they stand with a distant look, sullenly waiting for a stop; but smelly gases get into their noses, they wrinkle slightly, then start to turn their heads around, trying in vain to detect an impudent fart, some try to go to another part of the cabin (I call them defectors) and this is their main mistake. Farting into static citizens is not interesting, because the maximum they can do is turn their heads. But when I see someone with a face turned green from vomiting trying to escape from the epicenter, I begin my hunt. I sneak up behind him, trying not to be noticed, and when the defector stops, naively believing that he has escaped from the terrible stench of anonymous farting, I stand next to him and relieve my intestines of gases with relief. The contented smile of the smart-ass fugitive quickly slips from his impudent face, he begins to violently turn his head around, and in anger jumps out of the bus at the nearest stop ... He stands on the street and eagerly swallows fresh air, waiting for the next bus, in which, he might even be able to get a free seat. He thinks the worst is over. But a few steps away from him, I'm standing and eating bonduelle green peas, anticipating a stinking reprisal against the sly one.

Up on one cheek, say "excusez-moi" and let it rip.
Since Covid, no-one really cares about farting anymore. If you cough or sneeze in a crowded elevator, people think you are disgusting. Break wind and its no big deal.

When I'm playing online tournaments, I can permit myself to fart as much as I want!

"J'adoube"

My anal beads have a special feature so my farts don't smell.